Decision Making
Life is full of choices. Some feel simple. Others leave us stuck, anxious or unsure.
Whether you're facing a career move, navigating a relationship decision, or just trying to choose the next right step, it can help to slow down and follow a process that’s grounded, thoughtful and values-based.
Here’s a gentle and practical guide to support you through.
1. Pause and Notice
Start by slowing things down.
Take a breath. Tune in. What’s happening in your mind, your body, and your heart?
What thoughts are present?
What emotions are showing up?
Is your body holding tension or stress?
You don’t have to solve anything right away. Just notice. Creating space to become aware is the first step toward a wise decision.
2. Clarify the Decision
Sometimes it’s hard to decide because we’re not actually clear on what the decision is.
Try asking yourself:
What are the actual options I’m considering?
What’s within my control?
Is there something deeper going on underneath this surface-level choice?
Writing things out or talking it through can help bring clarity.
3. Connect to What Matters Most
Instead of only focusing on what’s easiest or least risky, ask:
Who do I want to be in this?
What do I care about most deeply?
If I looked back on this in five years, what would I hope I had chosen?
When your decision aligns with your values, it tends to lead to a deeper sense of peace, even if the path is challenging.
4. Consider the Impact
Each option you’re considering has likely benefits and costs, both now and in the long run.
You might ask:
How will this affect me emotionally and practically?
What could it mean for the people around me?
Am I being led by fear or avoidance?
Sometimes the path that feels uncomfortable in the moment is actually the one that honours what matters most.
5. Notice What Might Be Getting in the Way
Inner obstacles are common in decision-making. You might notice:
Fear of making the wrong choice
Pressure to keep others happy
Perfectionism or paralysis from overthinking
These are normal human patterns. Acknowledge them kindly, and then bring your attention back to your values and what feels meaningful.
6. Take a Small Step
You don’t have to have it all figured out to move forward.
Often, clarity comes after action.
What’s one small, safe step you could try?
Could you have a conversation?
Could you gather more information?
Could you experiment with a short-term choice?
Small steps create momentum and help you learn as you go.
7. Reflect and Adjust
After taking a step, pause again.
What did you learn?
How do you feel now?
Is there a next step to take?
Decision-making isn’t usually one big moment. It’s a process of checking in, choosing, learning, and adjusting.
A Gentle Reminder
There is no perfect decision. But you can make choices that reflect your values, your wisdom, and your care for yourself and others.
Even if the path isn’t clear, you can keep showing up and moving in the direction that matters.
You don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step. — Martin Luther King Jr.